I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
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