i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
