I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
