am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
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