What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Randomize