Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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