I didn't shave. On purpose
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
