they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
not ubering you a puppy
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
