we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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