I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
