Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
