is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
This is classic penis vs brain.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize