There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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