It's Friday. Sex?
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize