WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
