I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
