So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
