It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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