It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
