No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
