Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
