I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
