Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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