I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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