giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
