Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
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