He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
We had sex on a dog bed..
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
