She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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