Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize