Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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