i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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