i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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