Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
My ass is underappreciated
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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