yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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