after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize