no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
