hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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