Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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