some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
