Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize