I wish my penis had an off switch
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Randomize
