in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
