you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
