This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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