I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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