My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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