PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
