I'm really into asian looking animals
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
