We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
