It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
