We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
